The last time I wrote I was in thinking mode. And boy have I been thinking. My brain hurts! I’m sorry it took me so long to deal with my own head, but I want to share with you what I’ve learned in the past several weeks.
I’ve been struggling with self-doubt and indecision when it comes to the direction I want to take in pursuing my dreams. So rather than just let that indecision fester, I’ve been facing it and dealing with the underlying reasons I’m feeling those things. I warned you I was going to be honest and transparent on this website… and here we go!
I have a friend who tells me that I’m the most self-aware person she knows. I don’t know about winning any prizes for the distinction, but yes, I’m pretty self-aware and have a good handle on what’s going on inside my own head. So when my head gets jumbled and I doubt my own inner strength, decisions and life direction – I can’t just sit idly by and let it be. I need to take action.
I’m sort of a research-aholic. So when I am facing a problem I don’t know how to solve, I turn to others who have already figured things out so I can learn from them. Google is your friend. He helps you find lots of amazing stuff! So this is what I found and what I did with all this great information…
- Read the book “Choose Yourself” by James Altucher – it focuses a lot on rising from the ashes after the 2008 economic crash, but the basic premise of choosing yourself in the face of remaking yourself after hitting bottom can apply all areas of your life, not just business or mortgages. I literally read this book straight through without stopping in 2.5 days while on vacation last week, it was that good!
- Read the book “The ONE Thing” by Gary Keller and Jay Papasan – I kept seeing this book recommended over and over in the business forums I’m part of. I could kick myself for taking so long to finally pick it up. It’s about cutting through the cluttered task list and multi-tasking mindset and finding your way to the ONE most important thing that needs to be done next to move you closer to your big goals in life.
- Dove into research about overcoming self-doubt and pursing the life you want to live. Which ended up taking me down a rabbit hole about lifestyle design. I’m going to write more about this concept, but in the meantime, here’s a great introductory article on fizzle.com called “What is Lifestyle Design.”
- Spend a LOT of time in my journal just writing it all out of my head. I use a Midori-like Travelers Notebook as my everyday-carry journaling system … and I’ve designated one whole notebook insert as my brain dump spot for this research project (I’ve filled half the pages already).
I also spent some time exploring other financial avenues of achieving my goals. We’ve talked about ways to generate passive income here before and I had decided on writing, courses, speaking as it relates to setting and achieving your big dreams. I’m pursuing my dreams right here in public and I want to help you achieve yours too. But as I said in my last article, I was having major doubt about whether that was the right avenue for me or not.
So I looked into other stuff that didn’t require such a “public” type of pursuit. I won’t hash out those details here, but let’s just say I was looking for a way to avoid facing my discomfort. You see … I am an introvert (INFP personality type – more about what that means in an upcoming article) and interacting with people in situations like one-on-one life coaching and speaking to large groups is so far outside my comfort zone that it had my running scared.
Then I came across a section in “The ONE Thing” that hit me between the eyes and knocked me on my derrière. Let me share the quote:
Think as big as you possibly can and base what you do, how you do it, and who you do it with on succeeding on that level. Pursue a big life and you’re pursing the greatest life you can possibly live. TO live great, you have to think big.
Big goals can seem unattainable at first. It’s important to realize that on the journey to achieving big, you get bigger. Big requires growth, and by the time you arrive, you’re big too! What seemed an insurmountable mountain from a distance is just a small hill when you arrive – at least in proportion to the person you’ve become. Your thinking, your skills, your relationships, your sense of what is possible and what it takes all grow on the journey to big.
As you experience big, you become big.
Don’t fear big. Fear mediocrity. Fear waste. Fear the lack of living your fullest live. Courage isn’t the lack of fear, it’s moving past fear. Thinking big isn’t the absence of fear, but moving past doubts. Living big will let you experience your life potential.
This is what I’ve been saying all along here. Set big dreams then create a task list of little goals to work on step-by-step until suddenly you realize you’ve achieved something bigger than you ever thought possible. As you achieve each small goal, you grow bigger and you’re ready for the next small goal, which will make you a little bit bigger. Soon you’ll be big enough for your BIG dreams.
So why did I abandon my own life philosophy when doubt crept in and scrambled my brain? Emotions, that’s why. Fear and doubt are pretty powerful emotions and when your brain latches on to negative emotions they certainly demand a lot of attention and screw up your better judgement. I know that you “grow as you go” but I let the emotions of fear and self-doubt cloud my intelligence and I got side tracked.
But I’m back on track now.
I’m here and I’m ready for the next ONE thing that’s in my path to be tackled. Oh sure, I fully expect fear and self-doubt to sneak up and grab me many more times as I pursue my big dreams. But next time I’m going to be more prepared and it won’t take me so long to beat those emotions back with my big stick of power and courage.
I’ve cleared away most of the self-doubt and indecision that’s been clouding my path for the past couple months. I’m moving forward through the fear. Are you with me? Let’s do this thing! What’s holding you back and how are you facing it? Is there anything I can do to help you through your own self-doubt? Let me know.